Should I stay or should I go?

Should I stay or should I go?

When recently asked this question, I had to remember… I am a “coach” not a counselor and it is not my job, or even my place, to tell people what to do. This is a very tricky question and has so many variables that I can’t really answer that question for anyone, other than myself. *Side note – no honey, I’m NOT asking that question… you are stuck with me for always <3 * So when asked that question, the best I can do is to offer some questions that a person might want to consider in making their choice. Most of these are geared towards a couples’ relationship. I would think that if you are struggling with a friendship relationship some of these could apply as well. Are you happy in your current relationship? Why or why not? {For ease of repetition CR = Current Relationship} Do you want to stay in your CR? Why or why not? How does your significant other feel about the relationship? What future does your significant other see for the relationship? What has caused you to consider ending the relationship? Who else might be influencing your decisions? If there is someone else, what makes that person a better option for you? Are you considering a new person on a whim, or have you really thought this out? What do you believe your future will be with someone else? What future do you see if you stay in the CR? You certainly don’t want to leave your CR for another and find it was a mistake. You also don’t want to stay in a CR where you are miserable. In truth, you don’t want to miss your chance at true happiness – whichever choice you make. My husband often recommends Dr. Henry Cloud’s book “Necessary Endings”, which leans towards the business world, but has some insight that can be applied to personal relationships as well. The ultimate choice is yours. No one can make someone else stay in a relationship. I suppose they can make you leave one, but I would think if they have forced you out, you need to wake up and smell the coffee. Count your blessing because if you are not wanted in that relationship, you really shouldn’t stay anyway. Look at the opportunities that you now face – grin. My suggestion to this question is to not make any rash decisions. Ponder your actions, think it through, thoroughly, and consider seeking wise counsel from someone not emotionally attached to the relationship. Remember, you have the option to change your mind, but if you have left a relationship and thereby broken trust, you may not be welcomed back with open arms. Be happy, my friends.

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