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The Platinum Rule

I think everybody knows the “Golden Rule.”  Go ahead, say it with me… “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

This week I heard the “Platinum Rule” for the first time.  Am I the only one who had never heard of it?  If there are others out there who don’t know it, it goes… “Do unto others as they would like to be done unto.”  This was a very profound statement for me.

I pondered this statement for a bit and ya know what… it makes sense! 

It was presented to me in a business situation, which makes total sense.  If I am doing business in Japan, as an example, I , being an American, want to shake hands but the person from Japan wants to bow.  If I stick out my hand and they bow, we may get off on the wrong foot.  Okay, this is a simplified example, but you get the idea.

However, if you think about it, this principle can work in our personal lives, as well.  I think the book, The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman, makes a great point of this.  If you love someone the way you want to be loved, it may not be what resonates with them.  If you love them the way they want to be loved, it will be more meaningful for them.  That makes sense, right?

To simplify, let’s take three friends… a hand-shaker, a hugger, and a cheek kisser.  If they all run into each other at the mall, the hand-shaker will grab everyone’s hands, which is probably okay with everyone.  The hugger will hug everyone, which is probably ok with the cheek kisser, but maybe not the hand-shaker.  The cheek kisser will go to kiss everyone, which is probably not okay with either one of the other two.  So, should the cheek kisser go ahead and kiss everyone, or would everyone be more comfortable if the cheek kisser acknowledged each friend in the way they were most comfortable? 

It’s something to ponder, don’t you think?  The Golden Rule is very nice and certainly has its place, but the Platinum Rule just makes sense! Grin.

 

*Pam Horton shares knowledge and teaches coping skills to military families in the Raleigh/Durham area.*

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